Emotional intelligence (EQ) in leadership
In the first episode of our new podcast, Beyond Potential, my trusty collaborator Tom Mason and I discuss several observations we’re making in the best leaders we’re working with. We called it the leadership equation, and although it’s by no means a comprehensive framework for leadership success, it highlights some of the areas that it might be worth looking at to make you more effective.
What is emotional intelligence?
One of the four areas is emotional intelligence. Emotional intelligence (or emotional quotient - EQ for short), is the capacity to understand and manage our own emotions and to recognise and influence the emotions of others. Psychologist Daniel Goleman popularised the concept, breaking it down into five key components:
Self-awareness: Recognising and understanding your own emotions
Self-regulation: Managing your emotions in healthy ways
Motivation: Being driven to achieve for the sake of achievement
Empathy: Understanding the emotions of others
Social skills: Managing relationships to move people in desired directions
Most people believe their level of EQ is good, but often think other people’s is lacking. This is a mismatch and makes for some interesting discussions in boardrooms and ExCo meetings across the world.
Why does emotional intelligence in leadership matter?
Emotional intelligence in leadership matters because high EQ leaders are more effective, as they often have the following skills:
Enhanced communication
Leaders with high EQ are adept communicators. They can read between the lines and understand the unspoken emotions of their team members, allowing them to address concerns more effectively, provide clear and compassionate feedback, and foster a psychologically safe environment where employees feel valued and heard.
Improved conflict resolution
High EQ leaders can navigate disputes by understanding the underlying emotions and motivations of those involved. They approach conflicts with empathy, striving for resolutions that acknowledge and address the emotional stakes, leading to more lasting and amicable solutions.
Stronger relationships
EQ helps leaders create deeper connections with their team members by showing genuine interest and concern for their well-being. These strong relationships foster trust and loyalty, crucial elements for a cohesive and motivated team.
Increased adaptability
High EQ leaders are more resilient and better equipped to handle change. They can manage their own stress and help their teams navigate uncertainty by maintaining a positive and stable presence.
Enhanced decision-making
Decisions are often influenced by emotions, and leaders with high emotional intelligence can better understand and manage these emotions, leading to more balanced and objective decision-making.
Can emotional intelligence in leadership be overplayed?
It would be hard to argue that any of these abilities are negative, but I do see a watch out. As with all strengths, EQ can be overplayed, and on the podcast, we talked about when this might happen.
I have a preference for prioritising relationships and the emotions of others. This is a strength, but when it’s overplayed, I find it difficult to walk away from a conversation with the other person feeling unhappy or dissatisfied. Sometimes this means that I stay in the conversation longer than I should, diluting my impact and making the other person feel worse.
I see this often in other leaders. Leadership involves lots of difficult conversations – think about having a conversation about a team member’s poor performance, or telling them their role is at risk of redundancy. It doesn’t matter how long you stay in the conversation trying to make someone feel better about the situation – they’re shitty things to hear, and so the person will feel shitty as a result.
The high EQ leader has the right amount of empathy to judge when to walk away, even if it feels uncomfortable.
How can we build our emotional intelligence?
There are a few ways in which we can do this.
Self-reflection
Taking time to reflect on our own emotional responses and their impact on our decision-making and interactions can help increase self-awareness and emotional regulation.
Feedback
Feedback from colleagues can provide valuable insights into how your emotions affect others and highlight areas for improvement.
Active listening
By practising active listening, leaders can improve their empathy and strengthen their relationships with team members.
Continuous learning
A learning mindset is core to high EQ. Attending workshops, reading books, and participating in professional development opportunities can provide new strategies and insights to enhance your EQ.
What’s your level of emotional intelligence?
What would you say your own emotional intelligence or EQ is like? At HEX, we hold a mirror up to senior leaders and we don’t pull any punches with our honest (but always kind) feedback.
Great leaders don’t happen by mistake.
The best leaders recognise their roles and responsibilities and hold their effectiveness in leading their teams in the highest regard. To find out more about the HEX leadership framework, or if you’d like to talk with us about developing your leaders, you can get in touch to book a free no-obligation discovery call.
